She also wondered if the new trash inspection came about because of her broken glass antics. He never questioned her. And she didn't think he knew. But she did notice a few days a couple of weeks ago when he wasn't feeling so great. Those two days were both heaven and hell. He left her alone for the most part - but she was terrified he would discover what she had done. She had found an old, chipped drinking glass near the dumpster. She ground it up and added it to her stash of light bulb glass. The light bulbs didn't seem to be doing much. This glass had a different texture to it. A different weight. She noticed things like this. She was curious if that had affected him more harshly. She hoped so.
She approached the dumpster and held the bag higher. She swung it a few times then let it sail into the opening. It caught the edge of the front wall, and hung there balanced on the edge. Half in and half out. She shoved at it a few times with her arms and finally coaxed it over high center. Would she ever get any taller? She hoped so. A couple more inches and she'd be able to toss it in with no problems.
As she turned back towards the parking lot, she caught movement at the far end. She stopped in her tracks. Held her hand up to her eyes to block the sun and squinted. She felt a cold stone drop in the pit of her stomach. He was watching her from the doorway. In his brown robe. Flicking a belt back and forth in front of him. Her blood turned to ice in her veins. What had she done now? Not that it mattered. It never mattered. She steeled herself and took a deep breath. She began jogging back to the apartment.
He was eyeing her as she trotted up. Flicking the belt with each sentence. "What took you so long?" he asked. (flick) "Were you out there messing around? (flick) What were you doing? (flick) You seem to have worked up a sweat."(flick) She wasn't sure which question to answer so she just remained silent.
"I'm talking to you...can't you hear me?"
"Yes, sir."
"Yes, sir WHAT?"
"Yes, sir, I can hear you."
"Then answer me."
"Yes, sir."
"Yes sir, WHAT?!"
He snaked his hand out and curled a finger under the neckline of her t-shirt. She jumped. He stretched the fabric out, then moved closer. He looked down her shirt. She was only 10, and had not hit puberty yet, but she still felt violated. He held her still by gripping her shoulder with his other hand.
"Yes sir, WHAT?"
"I don't...I don't know."
"You don't know what?"
"I don't know, sir."
"What do you not know? You're not making much sense."
"No, sir."
"No sir, what?"
"I don't know, sir."
"Well that's just too bad you don't know. Sounds like I need to teach you a lesson. Would you like that? You would, wouldn't you? I'll bet you can't wait to learn something from me. It makes you excited, doesn't it? Lock that door and come here. I need to get you cleaned up. You're filthy. You know I don't like it when you're sweaty.' He turned and walked away, stroking and rearranging his parts beneath his robe.
Her legs turned to rubber. The blood drained from her face. She knew what was coming. She tried to keep her breathing even and steady. 100...99...98...97... she started the count down as she walked. It helped take her mind away from the present. She would think about a beach today.